Here’s What My First Mammogram was Like

It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything here and it feels better to be in this moment more than I could imagine. I’ve been on a journey and am still on it. I am really pouring into myself lately in regards to my overall health.

I had my meds readjusted and have been on keto since the beginning of the year. I’m down 26 pounds and am celebrating the tiny wins along the way.

I am making an effort to drink water. Water ya’ll. I was only getting water in how ever many cups of coffee I chose to drink on a given day. Dehydration is real and is not a fun place to be.

For the first time, in a long time, I just feel good. I feel happy. I am really connecting with prioritizing myself. I’m catching myself from saying “I’m sorry”, unless the situation actually calls for it. I’m blasting Lizzo and Patti LaBelle and laughing a lot more over my latest favorite tea flavors. I feel worthy.

I had my first well woman exam for the first time in 10 years. I cannot believe that let that go for that long. That was just ridiculous of me. Having a history of endometriosis, this is something I always did annually like clockwork, but somehow the past 10 years just got away from me. I am not going to beat myself up over it because I went. I am celebrating the fact I went and am done for a year.

Today, I had my first mammogram. I am 5 years past due. Again, not beating myself over this. I am celebrating the fact that it’s done and wanted to share the experience with you.

I didn’t have much to go by. Growing up, I’ve always heard how bad this hurts and there was much debate in my household if it hurt more for smaller chested women or larger chested women. Naturally, I was anxious because I had no idea what to expect other than pain being deliberately given to my girls at my own will. Lord, help me.

After completing an iPad that needed my entire history and asked if I ever had cancer at least three times and paperwork asking “Are you sure you’re not pregnant?” and telling me, “If I think I could be pregnant, please let a staff member know.”, I finally am called back. The anxiety is racing at this point, but I’m still doing ok.

I was self introduced the warmest and kindest lady who was going to take my mammogram today named Shital. She showed me to the small changing room and advised me to put my belongings in one of the two available lockers, lock it, take the key with me and put on the dressing gown. She closed the door and there I was - alone and staring at the pile of rose and pink colored coverups to put on open in the front. “I can do this”, I was telling myself.

I am super modest. I remember even hating changing clothes in middle school P.E. class because I always felt like I was being stared at. I would do anything to not have to suit up and suit out.

I put the coverup on and caught myself swinging it back and forth in front of the floor length mirror, watching it flow right beneath my shoulders. I looked ridiculous in that short dressing gown I referred to as a “cape”.

Walking in, Shital knew this was my first mammogram and she couldn’t have been more patient with me. She explained the entire process and helped ease my discomfort both mentally just by talking to me.

The first image was what I would describe as uncomfortable. There was pressure but nothing that felt like my boob was a car getting crushed in the junkyard. Nope, that came with the second image. That was where the “Hulk, smash!” was happening on my left side had me saying, “Oww!” and trying to think of anything other than being in that moment.

The right side was captured without a hitch and the second snap image didn’t feel anything like the left.

Just like that, it was over. I was done. I had done it!

Shital showed me the images. That was actually pretty cool because I love anatomy things. That would also be the only way my boobs would ever be caught on film.

Shital is very good at what she does. She eases fears, she educates and she does her job with a shining light. The world needs more ladies like Shital, who wanted me to pass along this message: “Ladies, please go get your mammograms, pap smears and prioritize your health. Early detection is key.”

Please encourage your wife, sister, mom, grandmother, friend, neighbor or whomever to take care of themselves. This time we make could literally save lives. Be well.